Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Reading Is No Bed of Roses On This Bed


If you thought the Tempurpedic™ mattress was the last word on healthy and comfortable rest, the Swedish have produced a sharp alternative based upon an old, tried and true style of torturous relaxation.

Welcome back the bed of nails, 21st century-style.

Power-napping at the office. Note that books can be propped up
for reading by carefully inserting them within the spikes.
Caution: Always take care when turning pages.

Those who enjoy reading while reclining, particularly at bedtime, may find that the new nail beds require a period of adjustment before curling up with a good book can begin. Words on the page assaulting the eyes like, uh, nails! will have to be endured until the heyas! oocha-ouchas! and holy mackerels! subside and one can concentrate on the text and not the tush.



The Shakti Mat™ with detail.



The Swedish Spike Mat by CuraComp.

”Now, I'm off to lay on my spike mat. Last night I fell asleep on it. How odd is that, to fall asleep on a bunch of plastic spikes. But people, I tell you, that little mat makes my back and whole body feel so much better. Much more limber. It releases tension. And makes me sleep better. So, let the sleepy Spikey Fairy come and get me... Zzzz” - Jeacline.

Inferring from testimonials such as the above, it would follow that lying upon a Shakti Mat™ while reading at bedtime should morph Morpheus into Usain Bolt and that only a mallet to the noggin can get you to sleep faster and more effectively.

Three paragraphs into War and Peace and Jeacline is out, cold. It's like Tolstoy took a sap to her after tucking her in for the night.

Here's a video from Shakti Mats to lull you into buying the latest in bedtime reading comfort. The attractive female voice narrating in Swedish only heightens the effect. Sold, alas, separately.


If you thought the Tempurpedic™ mattress was the last word on healthy and comfortable rest, the Swedish have produced a sharp alternative based upon an old, tried and true style of torturous relaxation.

Welcome back the bed of nails, 21st century-style.

Power-napping at the office. Note that books can be propped up
for reading by carefully inserting them within the spikes.
Caution: Always take care when turning pages.

Those who enjoy reading while reclining, particularly at bedtime, may find that the new nail beds require a period of adjustment before curling up with a good book can begin. Words on the page assaulting the eyes like, uh, nails! will have to be endured until the heyas! oocha-ouchas! and holy mackerels! subside and one can concentrate on the text and not the tush.



The Shakti Mat™ with detail.



The Swedish Spike Mat by CuraComp.


”Now, I'm off to lay on my spike mat. Last night I fell asleep on it. How odd is that, to fall asleep on a bunch of plastic spikes. But people, I tell you, that little mat makes my back and whole body feel so much better. Much more limber. It releases tension. And makes me sleep better. So, let the sleepy Spikey Fairy come and get me... Zzzz” - Jeacline.

Inferring from testimonials such as the above, it would follow that lying upon a Shakti Mat™ while reading at bedtime should morph Morpheus into Usain Bolt and that only a mallet to the noggin can get you to sleep faster and more effectively.

Three paragraphs into War and Peace and Jeacline is out, cold. It's like Tolstoy took a sap to her after tucking her in for the night.

Here's a video from Shakti Mats to lull you into buying the latest in bedtime reading comfort. The attractive female voice narrating in Swedish only heightens the effect. Sold, alas, separately.


If you thought the Tempurpedic™ mattress was the last word on healthy and comfortable rest, the Swedish have produced a sharp alternative based upon an old, tried and true style of torturous relaxation.

Welcome back the bed of nails, 21st century-style.

Power-napping at the office. Note that books can be propped up
for reading by carefully inserting them within the spikes.
Caution: Always take care when turning pages.

Those who enjoy reading while reclining, particularly at bedtime, may find that the new nail beds require a period of adjustment before curling up with a good book can begin. Words on the page assaulting the eyes like, uh, nails! will have to be endured until the heyas! oocha-ouchas! and holy mackerels! subside and one can concentrate on the text and not the tush.



The Shakti Mat™ with detail.



The Swedish Spike Mat by CuraComp.


”Now, I'm off to lay on my spike mat. Last night I fell asleep on it. How odd is that, to fall asleep on a bunch of plastic spikes. But people, I tell you, that little mat makes my back and whole body feel so much better. Much more limber. It releases tension. And makes me sleep better. So, let the sleepy Spikey Fairy come and get me... Zzzz” - Jeacline.

Inferring from testimonials such as the above, it would follow that lying upon a Shakti Mat™ while reading at bedtime should morph Morpheus into Usain Bolt and that only a mallet to the noggin can get you to sleep faster and more effectively.

Three paragraphs into War and Peace and Jeacline is out, cold. It's like Tolstoy took a sap to her after tucking her in for the night.

Here's a video from Shakti Mats to lull you into buying the latest in bedtime reading comfort. The attractive female voice narrating in Swedish only heightens the effect. Sold, alas, separately.

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